Owner: Speak Sexy URL:http://speaksexy.blogspot.com Join Date: Fri, 09 Mar 2007 15:54:48 -0600 Rating:0 Site Description: Provocative and educational discussions (and pictures!) about all things sexual. Authored by a female sexologist.
Booty Calls - When Porn Just Isn't Enough! 2007-02-07 10:29:00 We've all been there at some point...Well, most of us anyway. It's late. You're horny. And watching those little people on the screen bang away at each other just isn't doing it for you. Nope, tonight you want...you need...the real thing.So you get to thinking about your options. At the top is usually your X's if you're still on speaking terms. Hell, even if you aren't you'll probably still add them to your mental list of do-ables. After all, at some point in history they agreed to sleep with you so your chances of hooking up with one of them is a lot greater than with the girl you passed on the street earlier who got you in this mood in the first place! Then you remember you have no X's...Next on the list might be your "good friends." Yep, you think, good friends can come with "benefits" right? He/she did give you that come-hither look a couple days ago...didn't they? Hmm, maybe you imagined it. You're starting to hallucinate. Moving right along...Ugh! You've exhausted yo Read more:booty, Porn
Obsession, Seduction, Possession 2007-02-05 15:04:00 If I had to sum up my sexual desires into just one picture, I think this would be it. There's something about the possessive/tender way he's holding her, the hungry, almost threatening look in his eyes. She's given her all to him...and he's reveling in that power. Maybe it started at a bar, or in a library, or at work. It doesn't really matter where. What does matter is that he saw her, scented her, and made the decision to go after her. But how?ObsessionFirst, he stalked her. She consumed his every waking thought as well as his darkest fantasies. He was smart about it though, and casually asked around, found out who she was - her name, favorite foods, that she preferred stringy lingerie. Eventually he could recite her weekly schedule better than she could. Only when he was sure he knew everything there was to know about her, content he'd gathered enough ammunition against her, did he begin the chase.SeductionShe didn't realize what was happening at first. They just seemed to r
Come Here...I Want to Smell You! 2007-01-30 14:55:00 A hug. A kiss. A cuddle before bed.Whether you're conscious of it or not, the way your lover smells plays a large roll in your every day interactions with them. More so than anyone else, your lover is allowed to pass in and out of your invisible personal space barriers almost as if they didn't exist. (Sometimes to a very annoying degree!) This close proximity forces you to breathe in their scent, be it natural/perfumed, good/bad, and as a result, your brain makes primitive judgments about your overall sexual compatibility. In recent years perfumes/colognes claiming to contain human sexual pheromones have become common place on the market. The manufacturers of these scents say that the pheromones will attract lovers to the wearer without any extra effort. For example, all a woman would have to do is walk by and smell your ultra-sexy, pheromone-enhanced masculine scent and she would fall adoringly at your feet. Now although effects of this magnitude are not only statistically improbabl
Sexiest Blog Contest!!! Win a Gift Certificate Worth $25!!! 2007-01-27 16:10:00 Do you have a blog or website dedicated to sexuality that I might like?Would you like to win a gift certificate worth $25 to Simply4Lovers.com this Valentine's Day?Then send me a link to your blog at SpeakSexy@aol.com so that I can review it! I'm going to pick my favorite site based on it's quality of content, originality, and aesthetic appeal. All entires must be emailed to me no later than February 12th...that gives you a little over two weeks from now! Also, it must be your blog, not someone else's!Only the winner will receive the gift certificate, but I will also put a link list on this blog to the best 10 sites that I review! So even if you don't win, your blog might get more exposure just for entering*!Why am I doing this? Because I'd like to reward you, my wonderful readers, this Valentine's Day for your continued support - and I'd also enjoy seeing some of your sexuality blogs or websites.Official RulesIt must be your blog or website.It must be about sexuality - eit Read more:Blog, Contest
For Her...I'd Become A Lesbian! 2007-01-25 15:15:00 So, Angelina has once again been making the news! Now normally I'm not all that into what celebrities are or aren't doing, because frankly, the lot of them seem like rather boring people. But every once in a while someone comes along who catches my attention, and Angelina is by far my favorite famous person to watch! Sure there are lots of beautiful women in show biz, but I haven't heard of anyone else wearing a vial of their lover's blood around their necks...at least not publicly! She, on the other hand, is brazen enough to talk about all of her wonderfully devilish sexual desires without as much as a blush...Finally a woman who makes me proud!I guess according to recent interviews and what-not, Angelina's saint-like image of late has finally been shattered. Many newspapers are quoting her as saying that her new baby is "a blob" and that she has been too snippy with reporters on her recent red carpet strolls. So what?! If I were her I'd be snippy and sarcastic too. This whole c Read more:Lesbian
What Type of Sex Do You Fantasize About Most When You Masturbate? 2007-01-21 15:59:00 I'm sorry, did the picture give it away?! The results of last week's poll were pretty clear...During your privatest moments of self-indulgence most of you conjured up images of Oral Sex! In some ways I was surprised by this. I thought people might fantasize about things they rarely did in life, but considering that oral-genital contact is part of many couples' routine sexual scripts (you know how you fall into a pattern with your partner after a while? That's what I mean by "sexual script."), I would have thought anal sex might win since it is, in general, less practiced. But I was wrong! (I love being wrong...keeps life full of surprises!) Now I am left wondering what could be the reasons for your oral sex preference?Does oral sex feel better than other types of sex so the thought of it turns you on more? Is the basic imagery more appealing? Does the thought of having your most sensitive and vulnerable body parts between someone else's potentially hazardous teeth excite you? Hmmm Read more:Masturbate
Part III of the Valentine's Day Countdown Series - Send Your Lover a "I Want You To Think I'm Romantic But Don't Want To Really Do Anything" gift! 2007-01-18 14:30:00 Want to See More? Gifts I Mean!Although they may seem pretty traditional, I think gift baskets can be a really nice way to show your appreciation to your lover...and if you use them in creative ways they can be very sexy! Take for example a basket full of sweets...Tit for Tat Valentine's GameWhen the basket arrives let your lover happily discover all of the goodies you have sent to him or her. Once they have seen everything you have so thoughtfully provided and are about to sample the contents, knock their greedy little hands away and slowly gather up each and every treat back into the basket. As they begin to protest smile and inform them that they will have to work to get everything back one item at a time. Now, exactly what they have to do and how much they get as back as a reward is completely up to you. Their tasks should of course be sexual in nature (one chocolate for every hug, kiss, orgasm, etc). After all, this shouldn't really be work, it should be a fun game for both of y Read more:Romantic
Disney's Sex Goddess Revealed...or...Disempowering the Enemy 2007-01-15 13:47:00 Disney's Sex Goddess Revealed!Yep, the winner of the Disney's Sexiest Character Contest goes to...Jasmine from Aladin! Congratulations Aladin, you are the luckiest of them all, and the envy of every cartoon man in the imagination! I must admit, I had to laugh at the results of this poll because they were all over the place. Just as many people voted that they would "Do Them All" as said "Eeewww, None You Pervert! They're Cartoons!" I guess when it comes to finding cartoon characters attractive or not there are a lot of people on both sides of this issue. I can't wait for the fight between them when it comes...and it will come! Oh yeah, and if you were wondering why Pocahontas was not one of the contestants last week it's because her raccoon friend died and she was trying to commune with his spirit via the mystical talking tree.Here are the complete results without Pocahontas:Jasmine from Aladin - 36%Belle from Beauty and the Beast - 14%I'd Do Them All! - 14%Eeewww, None! - 14%Sn Read more:sex
Part II of the Valentine's Day Countdown Series - Sexy Letters! 2007-01-13 15:24:00 "Stop struggling! Now, you can instantly create and send romantic sexy letters and emails, without having to writea single word! Dozens of original sensuous letters to choose from!"I found this cool product by accident this past week and thought I might as well feature it since it could potentially solve a lot of Valentine's Day problems, or just add a bit of easy excitement to your life. It's a complete set of pre-written erotic letters that you can personalize and give to your lover. I think it's a great idea. Everyone enjoys getting letters detailing how much their lover desires them and in exactly what ways, but a lot of people have trouble writing these kinds of letters. If this product is actually as good as it claims to be, then it could be a lot of fun...especially if your lover never finds out that you didn't actually write them. But even if they do know it wasn't you who put the letter together, it was you who thought of it, did it, and put the effort in, so that should
The Sexual Benefits of Virtual Lovers 2007-01-09 14:19:00 Not that I am trying to date myself, but as part of the first wave of computer literate adolescents I'll admit to spending a great deal of my free time exploring my growing sexuality online. If I had a question, I googled it. If I wanted to test out a new sexual persona, I simply popped into a chat room and engaged the first "wanna cyber?" request. After all, it really didn't matter who was on the other end as long as they could type fast enough.I loved that I could pretend to be any age, any gender, any hair color...Hell, I didn't even have to be human or obey the laws of physics! I could have sex as a floating upside-down green fairy in the middle of a chocolate-filled lake if I wanted!This ultimate, imaginative, interactive, sexual exploration allowed me to come to a foundational understanding of who I was, not only as a sexual being, but as a woman. The best part was that my exploration had no real world consequences. I couldn't become pregnant or catch a disease. I didn't hav
What's the Most Kissable Body Part? You Told Me! 2007-01-07 13:37:00 Want to know what the most kissable body part is (Besides the most obvious ones!)? You guessed it, the thigh! Soaring above all other erogenous zones, the thighs won out, capturing 27% of your votes as the place you most wished to be kissed this New Years! Well, did your wish come true? I certainly hope it did!As the 'keeper of secrets' the thighs are known as the gateway to sexual pleasure for both men and women. With the right amount of kissing, caressing, and fondling these gates will open smoothly, giving you plenty of time to frolic around in the Promised Land...But beware! Try to barge or plunder your way in and you'll not only end up locked outside the gates, but magically transported to a land far far away (such as the Cold Shoulder Mountains)! And by the way, NO ONE voted for the shoulders!Here are the complete results of Most Kissable Body Parts of 2006...Thighs - 27%Tummy/Chest - 21%Neck - 19%Lips - 18%Ears - 12%Back - 2%Hands/Feet - 1%Shoulders - 0%Now that you're arme
Part I of the Valentine's Day Countdown Series - Chocolate Body Paint...Need I Say More? 2007-01-03 14:44:00 Now that all those religious holidays are over and done with (thank God!...ha, just kidding...) we can begin to shift our thoughts to the best consumer-driven made-up holiday of all...Valentine's Day! With no real reason to exist, other than to spend more money on the people you love to prove that you love them, Valentine's Day tops my list as the holiday you can have the most sexual fun with. Given the nature of this event, I've decided to spend some time over the next month and a half reviewing products that I think not only make great gifts, but also have the potential to add intimacy and playfulness to your relationship. (Remember I'm always trying to make sex fun in that "little-kid-with-a-toy" kind of way!)So, without further ado, here is Part 1 of the Valentine's Day Countdown Series...Chocolate Body Paint!Why It's A Good Idea:Mmmmm, is there anything more delightful than the thought of sex and chocolate? I mean really! What could be better than combining two of my favorit
Where's the Best Place to Get Wet & Wild? You've Decided... 2006-12-27 13:12:00 The best place to get your woman (or yourself) wet is...The Shower or Bathtub. What traditionalists you are! With an overwhelming 47% you've made me a believer that when it comes to sex, people usually go with what's most convenient. How decidedly boring! At least a few of you were more adventurous and thought having sex in the rain or the ocean would be a nice reason to get out of the house! The complete results were:Shower/Bathtub 47%Pool 16%Rain 13%Water & Sex Should NOT Mix 11%Lake 8%Ocean 2%I was surprised that only 2% of you liked the idea of having sex in the ocean best. Is that because you aren't near a beach? Because you haven't done it before? I think sex in the ocean can be a great experience, especially since the natural rocking of the waves are able to set a very luxurious pace. And a whopping 11% don't like sex and water at all! Wow, much higher than I expected! So the next time you decide to surprise your partner with a romantic bath, make sure you know befor Read more:Wet, WILD
Have Yourself A Sexy Little Christmas...How To Liven Up Those Holiday Parties! 2006-12-23 14:08:00 I realize I have not posted much in the last week, but needless to say I have been quite busy with the impending holiday parties and such, so I apologize. I know you've missed me terribly...All this holiday cheer has forced me to ask myself, have I been naughty or nice this year? This question often befuddles my little mind because I'm always both naughty and nice, and usually at the very same time! After all, doing all those 'naughty' things is what keeps the 'nice' things, like relationships, going right? Cut out the naughty, and you lose the nice!Now that I have used the words 'naughty' and 'nice' at least five times each, you should definitely be in the Holiday Spirit! Keeping with that, here are just a couple spicy ideas for you to consider during the next egg-nog filled days...For Those of You with Male Partners:Candy Cane SurpriseDuring one of the duller party moments, grab a candy cane off that tree, catch his eye from across the room, and treat him to a little candy-
Last Week's Poll Results - So, What Are Your Favorite Kinks?! 2006-12-17 16:04:00 Because I'm sure you are just falling over your chair in suspense...Your Number One Kink Is...Sex in Public!! We have a winner by far! Here are the full results of last week's poll:Sex in Public - 38%Role Play - 21%Spanking - 15%Bondage - 10%Other - 8%No Kinks - 5%Humiliation - 3%So, in honor of all you crazy people out there who tingle at the idea of maybe getting caught doing something naughty in a place that you know you should be doing something more socially acceptable, (like sitting quietly and watching the movie like everyone else thank you very much!) I will write about all the many possibilities available this side of being arrested. You do realize that is a possibility, right? Indecent exposure and all that, remember? But I won't bore you with the down side of your kinks because honestly, those are no fun to think about. Plus, being arrested for having sex in a department store changing room does make for a great story to tell your grandchildren someday...Here goes, my top
Can a Professional Submissive Make You a Better Dominant? 2006-12-15 12:25:00 I recently received this question from one of my lovely readers, and thought it was provoking enough to make it a post. So, here is the question and my response to it. What do you think? Do you agree or disagree with me and why? I look forward to hearing your opinions! Thanks!Question: I have been reading and soaking up the information in your blogs. I have been considering in getting my pecker wet, pun intended, with a prostitute who specializes in D/s. I am very excited with the thought of being a Dominant and don't want to embarrass myself by not being assertive and controlling in my initial forays into this new world that I am about to enter. I realize that it takes agreement between the consenting lovers on what is allowed and how far the dominance can go but I feel that assertiveness is a telling factor on convincing the submissive to open herself to the experience. Hopefully the professional experience will give me that knowledge and confidence.Answer: This is a great question!
Sexual Symphonies Served in a Tall Glass... 2006-12-12 14:21:00 Does alcohol make sex better? I think its effects are particularly interesting. As you know, alcohol is a depressant, which literally means it slows down the functions of our bodies, such as our hearts, thus slowing down the entire circulatory system. Blood circulation, however, plays a major role in both the ability to become physically (sexually) aroused as well as influencing the way we interpret tactile sensations (Was that bite nice and soft? Just hard enough? Or what the hell were you thinking get off of me?!). Based on this one would assume that drinking four beers in quick succession would lead to a much slower sexual response time and a decrease in the pleasurable experience of sex. However, this ingenious substance also has the intriguing ability to inhibit our mental inhibitions. Although physically it may slow us down, mentally it opens us up, allowing a momentary respite from that ultra-critical, politically-correct voices which tells us what we can and can't do, what is
Four-year-old Super Hero Found! 2006-12-10 13:31:00 His Power? The amazing ability to Sexually Harass Grown Women! That's right, CNN just broke the news today. There is a little boy in Waco, Texas (where else?!) that has been suspended from preschool for allegedly rubbing his face inappropriately against a female employee's breasts! Now although this action used to be called a *hug,* a behavior typical of all healthy little boys and girls, this little boy does it in such a way as to make the lucky woman feel harassed...sexually. This is a super power indeed! How in the world does such a young boy create within an adult woman the feeling of being sexually threatened or offended? Was it the come-hither look in his eyes, or the charismatic way he nuzzled her breasts? Don Juan step aside, we have found a new and improved version, and this model starts his seduction before he's entered kindergarten!How I wish I were making this up. It is a very sad example of just how ridiculous the United States' mentality is toward sexuality in general
Feminism, Rules, & Kink 2006-12-08 17:24:00 Power dynamics are found in every human relationship. That's right, nothing too profound yet. And even though everyone knows that these dynamics exist, very little is ever questioned regarding how those dynamics form or how to change them once they are firmly established. In our professional lives these unwritten rules of behavior rarely pose a problem since they are often dictated by convention. Work place interpersonal conduct is usually very well outlined in either the bylaws of the company, or the larger laws of the country (often much too much in my opinion, but that's another topic!). However, the rules that govern intimate relationships tend to be much more flexible, with less outside structure imposed upon those involved, especially since the United States' sexual revolution of the 1970s when it was precisely those intimate rules that were largely overthrown. And while this was a wonderful turning point for gender equality, it nevertheless left monogamous, committed couples
Misunderstandings of Affection 2006-12-06 13:57:00 Hugging, caressing, kissing...These things are done as a warm-up to more profound sexual festivities, Right? But these things are also done for the sake of just doing said things...Right? If you answered yes to both questions, you can stop reading now. Congratulations, you must have perfect relationships. For the rest of us, I'd like to clear up a few things about affectionate acts. To begin, these supposedly lesser forms of sex play are often attributed to the needs of women. As a rule, it appears that women are thought to enjoy these aspects of sexuality just as much, if not more so, than the act of intercourse itself. Women tend to equate the amount of affection given and received as being directly proportional to the amount of love felt between partners. It is no surprise then, that when in a long term relationship, women often complain that their significant others are not as "loving" as they once were. They argue that the only time their lovers display these cuddling behaviors a
Fantasy Lovers - What's Your Favorite Kind? 2006-12-04 14:18:00 It seems that when it comes to lovers, the human imagination just isn't fully satisfied with the normal, everyday human being. Instead of using the ho-hum characters who constantly surround us in the real world, we endeavor to create the most fantastical creatures to titillate our mental senses. Judging from the plethora of fantasy art and TV shows out there (think Buffy, Dark Angel, even the good old Xena and Wonder Woman!) I'd say these little indulgent escapades into other sexual worlds is something most people do...even if they won't readily admit to doing it. At once there is both the feeling that you are being silly in a little-kid-daydreaming kind of way, as well as the knowledge that having a fantasy about the proverbial monster-under-your-bed coming out and having his (or her!) wicked way with you is decidedly a naughty adult thought indeed!The variations of these lovers is astounding, and I'm sure everyone has their particular favorite...probably rooted in some strange ps Read more:Fantasy
To Orgasm or Not To Orgasm! 2006-12-03 20:51:00 The first sexual experience with a new partner is always a tricky time. Unfailingly questions arise to make us feel nervous or jittery, usually helping to add to the excitement of the moment. Questions like; What will this mean? Should we do it right now? Will he/she be good in bed? Will I be good in bed? And while these are all concerns that most men and women share, there is one question in particular that seems to be specifically female oriented...Will I have an orgasm?!For men, the answer almost goes without saying, "Yes I will." And if his orgasm could talk it would usually say something to the affect of, "This now concludes our sexual entertainment for this evening, thank you very much, and I hope you've enjoyed the ride!" However for women, even in today's world of Prime Time Orgasms, the answer to this question continues to be, "Probably Not!" In fact, according to an article recently published by CNN, 70% of all intercourse sessions end WITHOUT the woman experiencing the B
Sex During Menstruation...Drs agree it is perfectly healthy, but is it pleasant? 2006-12-02 17:41:00 Sticky and Messy, or Lubed and Ready? It seems to me that there is no middle ground for this issue; either you do it or you don't. Seeing as how every relationship involving at least one reproductive woman will have to decide on how to negotiate this monthly phenomena, I would assume it would be a very readily talked about topic among couples. However, I find that sex during menstruation, and menstruation in general, is a conversation very readily avoided by everyone involved. Women still consider it a "woman's thing" of which only women talk about to other women, and then only rarely at that. Men tend to avoid the topic like the plague, often letting well enough alone or cringing at the very thought that their usual object of worship is, for about five days a month, a volcano from hell. Yet even with all of this unease on both sides, some form of agreement, whether verbal or tacit, must be made about intercourse. Will all sexual contact cease? Will only heavy petting be allowed? Is
Is Pregnancy Sexy (& Should It Be)? 2006-12-01 17:56:00 I guess you could say it all started with the infamous Demi Moore...You remember, that one magazine cover that gave rise to an entire social debate over whether or not a pregnant female body is or should be considered sexy...If you were living in a cave during the early '90s, let me refresh your memory. Naked Pregnant Woman appeared on cover of magazine, making the public question their own ideas of decency, femininity, and the sanctity that is considered Motherhood. The debate has raged on, though to a lesser degree, with the introduction of Britney Spears' cover.Now, what I find particularly intriguing about this topic is that on one hand women want to be sexy. They want men, or women if they are lesbians, to desire them. While on the other hand they also want to be wives and mothers. (I am speaking very generally here, so please don't post tons of responses about this!) But is this really on the other hand, or is being a mother also supposed to be sexy? Considering that pregnanc
Pornography: Is It Good or Bad for Relationships? 2006-11-30 12:51:00 I thought I'd start us off with a topic that seems to get all sorts of mixed reactions; Pornography Use in Relationships. Leaving aside the more generic arguments against porn such as the degradation of women and such, some people claim that pornography is the very thing destroying their marriages, while others feel that it is just another useful tool in their creative toy box. Both sides of the argument are rather well known.Basic Against It:Its use fosters feelings of guilt in the user and mistrust, anger, and inadequacy in the partner.It gives men in particular unreasonable expectations of women's bodies and behaviors.It is cheating!Basic For It:In circumstances when partners can not be together, it is an alternative to having sex with someone else (long distance relationships, during times when one partner is unable or unwilling to have sex such as after the birth of a child, etc.)It adds spice to a long-term couple's hum-drum sexuality. It can generate new ideas or act as part
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